Saturday, January 14, 2006

One Word can Change Your Life

I was thinking back the other day about this big "Rah, Rah!" motivational conference which I dragged my ever-such-a-good- sport husband to about 7 years ago. It was hosted by motivational speaker extraordinaire Anthony Robbins (the guy with the big white teeth). I admit, much of it was coated in thick cheddar cheese, a bit over the top for my tastes, but sitting here thinking about it today, I realize how well that money was spent and I'll tell you why.

We heard from a "who's who" list of business leaders and motivational speakers. We paid a couple hundreds for dollars for the day and laughed that out the hours of speakers we heard from, we could really only remember three things. I remembered hearing an audible click in my brain when I heard these three things. I reinforced those ideas by immediately putting them into practice. Come to think of it, I couldn't put a price on the three sentences that stuck with me from our day "motivational day". When I meet a stranger on a plane, when I read a new book, or watch an Oprah, I'm always hoping to take away one new perspective. Three is a lot. Sometimes just a single word can improve your life....more on that in a future blog. Allow me to give you the cliff note version of what I took away from that day 7 years ago.

1. FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION:
Donald Trump was there. He was not the pop culture icon he is today, but certainly well known. He told a story about the power to accomplish anything if you believe you can. It was 1991 and he was at the lowest point of his career and facing certain bankruptcy. He recalled walking down 5th Avenue in NYC with former wife Marla Maples. They were in front of Tiffany's when they both noticed a homeless man holding a cup for donations. Marla remarked something to the effect that the man "had nothing." Trump recalled saying to her, "He has $900 million dollars more than me."

2. DO THE YUCKIEST THING ON YOUR TO DO LIST FIRST. It's called "Eating the frog"a term explained to us by my favorite author Brian Tracy. For those who make a to-do list everyday, if you had a list of 10 things to do and one of them was to "eat a frog", that item would likely remain undone for months. We all have a frog on our list. It's that one thing on your "to-do" list that reaches the top. For whatever reason, we are either intimidated, uncomfortable, nervous, embarrassed or to lazy to tackle it. There it lives and grows. The longer it stays on your list the bigger it grows in your imagination. Everyday we expend energy avoiding it. If it's the 10th thing on your list, you'll make up a 9A, a 9B, and a 9C just to avoid "eating the frog". We hardly enjoy crossing off the 9 other things, knowing number 10 is still out there. We waste time to avoid it. Number 10 on the list festers in the back of your mind like an energy eating tumor. Just when you've blocked it out... boom...headache, stomach drops, your mood takes a dive south, self-esteem plummets. Brian Tracy's advice....Wake up each day and make the "frog" the first thing you do. It never takes as long as you think and it really never tastes as bad as you think. I'm getting better at this. My favorite book of his on this subject is aptly titled, "Eat that Frog". Get it.

3. APPLY THE 80/20 RULE TO YOUR WHOLE LIFE: It's simple...20% of what you do accounts for 80% of your positive results. It's true of everything. Think about it. Of all of your friends only 20% of them really want to see you do well and support you, the other 80% are fun to be around, but not all that concerned with your well being, so give 20% of your friends 80% of your "friend time". 20% of what you do in your home directly improves the well being of your family. 20% of what you do at work no one else could do as well as you, 80% could probably be done by someone who is paid less, allowing you to focus your time on the 20% that get results. Often 80% of the way you spend your day bring you no closer to living the life you want to live, 20% of your activities do. You never wear 80% of the clothes bursting from your closet. What is it you want for your family, your health, your marriage, your career, your life? Figure out which area you want to tackle first. Next make a list of everything you're doing. Finally select the 20% of that list that truly brings you closer to your goal. Focus. Focus on the 20%. Focus on a way of freeing yourself from the other 80% and feel 100% better. Every couple of months step back and re-focus on your 20%.

That's the beauty of life improvement workshops, books, articles, posts, television. It's kind of like cleaning out your closet. You can't just G.I the place once and hope that your sweaters and shoes stay all nice and neat. Pick up a book, do an on-line search for a topic you're looking to improve. if you're spiritual, attend a motivational service. Call a friend blessed with words of wisdom and listen this time. Watch Oprah. Listen to Dr. Phil. Tune in for Dr. Laura. Read a blog. Even if you only remember three sentences the results of implementing positive change will be life improving.

Do me a favor. Please post any phrase, quote, or concept that directly caused you to make a change in your life. Even if the quote came from your 4th grade teacher. I'd love to hear it.

46 comments:

KellyC said...

Forget past mistakes.
Forget failures.
Forget everything
except what you're going to do now -
and DO IT.


and a shorter version . . .

Fall down seven times, get up eight.

Sarah said...

The phrases that help me are :

1. "If it can be fixed with money (or time or anything else), it's not a problem - it's an annoyance." - When my mom died of cancer it made me realize that most things in life can be fixed. The things that can't be fixed are the truly important things. When all the windows need replacing or the engine goes out or the clothes get ruined with bleach - those things are annoying and we don't want to shell out cash for them, BUT they are only annoying. They don't change our lives forever. It helps put things in perspective for me.

2.) A good friend of mine said, "I'm too old to go home and be mad about something someone said all night. If I'm going to have conversations about it in my head, I'm going to go to that person and have the conversation with them." I've learned that if someone ticks me off and I can't let it go, I need to respectfully and diplomatically go work it out with them rather than be steamed about it. It's hard to do, but saves time from being wasted by worrying/fuming.

3.) The last thought that pops in my head is from my mom. She said "Time is going to pass whether you do anything with it or not." If you want to get a degree, 2-3 years is going to pass and either you're going to come away with a degree or you're not. A year is going to pass and either you're going to get the body you want or you're not. Stop whining and wasting time and DO SOMETHING!!!!

SarahT/Busygirl28

VaNeSs said...

"It is never too early to become the person you want to become...and it is never to late either."
A teacher in High School used this quote all the time, it was from an author. Though I don't recall the author's name, I always kept that quote close to my heart and head. Thank you Charlene for being an inspiration to me.

Barbara said...

Take care, don't fight, and remember: if you do not choose to lead, you will forever be led by others. Find what scares you, and do it. And you can make a difference, if you choose to do so.

J. Michael Straczynski

He is an writer, and creator of Babylon 5, a great sci-fi tv series of the 90s.

Anonymous said...

Chalene,
You rock! After buying all your Turbo Jam workouts and being so inspired by your life, I decided to Google you and I found your blog. Thank you for the kick in the butt advice and the grocery list. I too have a blog: (http://mindandbodybootcamp.blogspot.com/) and promote your workout and blog on my blogspot. Since begginning Turbo Jam I have rekindled my love for dance and kickboxing. Being an instructor in both areas for so long, I lost my fire when I left my hometown to live with my fiance in the bay area. But your videos brought back that fire and has ignited in me an old dream to begin my own fitness/dance industry either through personal training, opening my own studio, or writing. Right now, I just want to share the healthy passion with families who come to the YMCA while I complete my BA.
Anyways, before I get too carried away, I just want to say thank you for being Chalene, a true and inspirational woman.

Anonymous said...

Someone wise once said to me, "Don't put a wishbone where your back bone should be."

irish_robbie said...

Hey Chalene! Great Post!

There is one quote that has stuck with me for years, since my early competitve days in martial arts. I think this quote had meaning to my life then, but still now, even if in a slightly different context. This quote is from Legendary Green Bay Packer's coach, Vince Lombardi.

"Winning is not a sometime thing: it's an all the time thing. You don't win once in a while; you don't do the right thing once in a while; you do them right all the time. Winning is a habit. Unfortunately, so is losing."

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Anonymous said...

HI Chalene,

Orange shox here!! I got 2 more sneakers yesterday (not shox but a fila and a nike)!!

First quote I love: JUST DO IT! I am really good at the frog. That is why I workout as soon as I can. That way is taken care of and I don't have to worry about not doing it later on.

From Tony Horton:
KPP and eat Fruit, Veggies, Whole Grains and Lean Protein.
Do your best and forget the rest!~ TH

I don't remember where this one is from but I love it:
Yesterday is a Memory, Tomorrow is a Mystery, Today is an Adventure!!

This is from one of those inspirational frames:
Effort: The spirit to win and the will to excel is always measured one stroke at a time

There is another one is the Can Do Attitude list! It is the positive and the negative way of seeing the same topic. I look at the positive cause there is always a Half full Glass and the nite is Full of Stars!

Have a great day! Now time to tackle the Frog.

Anonymous said...

I found myself putting fitness off until I felt like I could handle it. Then I came upon this quote, "It is easier to act yourself into a new way of feeling, rather than feel yourself into a new way of acting."

Kim Taylor said...

Chalene - I love this post!! My quote, that I truly live by, came from my no-nonsense dad. He once told me, "Kimmy, if you are going to do something, don't do it half-assed!" This rings true for me in EVERY aspect of my life! I love with all my heart, I put 110% into my job, I put my life into God's hands and bit by bit I use this to better every other part of my life, especially health, fitness & friendships!

Anonymous said...

My favorite quotes are:

1. If you dive and find not the pearls of the sea...blame not the ocean the fault is in thee!

2. Work like you don't need the money, love like you've never been hurt and dance like you do when no one is watching.

3. If money can solve your problems...then you don't have any problems. "Rita Davenport"

Thanks for reminding me!

G-Mama

TuxBaby said...

I still love the one I keep in my BB signature: "Obstacles are what you see when you take your eyes off your goal."

Thanks for this post, Chalene! I love the "Eat the frog" concept. I'd never heard of that before, but I surely understand it! I think I have about 4 frogs on my list for now because I've let them sit there long enough to mate & multiply.

And I can't thank you enough for TJ... it is SO much fun! It makes exercise a non-frog for those of us who might be allergic to exercise. ;-)

~TuxB

Anonymous said...

Loved that Chalene! Here are a few quotes that have guided me:

All big things in this world are done by people who are naive and have an idea that is obviously impossible. -- Dr. Frank Richards, English Writer

The great thing and the hard thing is to stick to things when you have outlived the first interest, and not yet got the second, which comes with a sort of mastery. -- Janet Erskine Stuart

Man has never made any material as resilient as the human spirit. -- Bernard Williams

I have always been delighted at the prospect of a new day, a fresh try, one more start, with perhaps a bit of magic waiting somewhere behind the morning. -- J.B. Priestly

Dusk said...

Here's one that changed (amped up) my workouts a few months back.

"You're already here, you might as well make the most of it!" - Jenelle (yep, your turbo sister!)

Anonymous said...

For me it would be 'PLAN AHEAD'. Whenever I am about to start a new project or set a new goal I 'Plan Ahead'

Predetermine a course of action
Lay out your goals
Adjust your priorities
Notify key personnell

Allow time for acceptance
Head into action
Expect problems
Always point to the successes
Daily review your program

I live by this. Its posted right next to my monitor, so whenever I am about start writing that email to my boss, to let him know I want to change a thing or two. I take a look up, and start to Plan Ahead.

*From 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership by John C. Maxwell

Anonymous said...

I don't have any specific quote that changed my life, but my sister's passing this past fall really gave me a reality check to re-evalute where I am, where I am going and where I want to go.

Very cliche, but I am getting much better at not "sweating the small stuff."

LauraJ.

Anonymous said...

I know this is gonna sound strange... but there's this line in a rap song that I recite to myself everyday. It goes like this:

"You're looking at a multi-millionaire in the flesh! I might not have it now, but I just got me a check!"

It's like if I handed you a check for millions of dollars.... Technically, you are now the owner of all that money, but you can't spend a dime of it unless you take your lazy butt down to the bank and cash it in!

So, I recite that line every time I walk past my reflection in a mirror. I know I don't look like a million bucks right now... but I have been blessed with so much potential for greatness and success.... and I can reap the benefits of that potential if only I take the time to claim what's mine.

Well, guess what?!?! I'm a multi-millionaire! We all are! Let's stop holding on to our checks and cash them in!!!

Who's with me???

:-)

Anonymous said...

Thank you for that list. I always end up witha few frogs on my list.

Anonymous said...

Chalene,

I have read and re-read the story Donald Trump told and I don't get it????!!!! A little help here...can someone tell me exactly what he meant by his comment "He has 900 million dollars more than me."

I feel like I should understand and "get it", but I don't.

THANKS! :O)

Oh and my quote: If the mind can conceive it, than you can achieve it!

Anonymous said...
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laura1952 said...

Great blog Chalene!

I have one quote that keeps me going and I have it sitting right below my computer which I do quote when talking with posters caught in the weight loss mayhem of trying to do it perfectly.

"I believe that you are here to become more of yourself and live your best life" Oprah Winfrey

So many people just get it in their heads that if the don't follow a workout/eating plan perfectly they are failures.

Instead of patting themselves on the back for everything they did do right, they are quick to kill all the good work with negative thoughts focusing only on what they did not do right.

The saying that did change my life forever 2 years ago tomorrow, January 19, 2004, was Bob Greene when he came out with Get With The Program and was on Oprah.

"Are you sick and tired of feeling sick and tired? Then stop wishing it and do something about it. No More Excuses. No More Lies. Are you ready to do the work, because it does take work."

For me, the rest is history. I did the work and I thank God everyday I happened to be in the right place at the right time to see that show.

Laura

Anonymous said...

One of my favorite quotes is: "Insanity is doing the same thing everyday and expecting a different result!" It sure made me look at my nutrition and workouts (they weren't working!) and change them so that I would notice the results that I wanted! :)

Anonymous said...

HI CHALENE. I love how your always fired up, it's contagious!! :)

So, I was randomly flipping through Oprah about 6 months ago and was reading her, "what I know for sure" article and this caught my eye, "Once you decide what you want, you make a commitment to that decision". Nothing in your life will ever happen unless you decide. ABSOLUTELY!! Following was the paragraph or quote by W.H. Murray that really hit home to me:

Until one is committed there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves, too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one's favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamt would have come his way. I have learned a deep respect for one of Goethe's couplets: "Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it./Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it." Make a decision and watch your life move forward.

This really changed my life and made me look at my decisions or lack of them. It jolted me out of the rut I was in. Since then everything has changed, my family/home life is awesome, I'm working towards my dream of being a teacher and am on my way to being in awesome shape (I found TJ and BB) :) and it all started with a decision and it's amazing how my life is unfolding...

The book Power of Intention by Wayne Dyer had a huge impact on me as well. Check it out!!

HAVE A SUPER DAY!

Anonymous said...

Hi Chalene,
I'm always interested in your posts and of course I love love love your workouts like no other!!!! In response to your comments on life changing quotes, here is one in a book I found very compelling and inspiring.

"Self-help guru Tony Robbins will teach us to AWAKEN THE GIANT WITHIN: HOW TO TAKE IMMEDIATE CONTROL OF YOUR MENTAL, EMOTIONAL, PHYSICAL AND FINANCIAL DESTINY! and provide the secrets to UNLIMETED POWER. Because we live in the tension between who we are and who we should be, self-help gurus can forever sell us the lie that we can close this gap ourselves. It's a mighty attractive offer. It's just not true." - Chuck Colsen (The Good Life)

If your a seeker (by seeker I mean someone looking to improve their lives or themselves), I highly recommend this book!!

Sincerely, ayhart

VaNeSs said...

Chalene, your my inpiration! I love you girl! (I hope this workd cuz every time i try to leave a comment it doesn't get posted) :)

cherriza said...

My phrase is "Life is what you make of it" and "Dreams do come true if you believe in them"

These have both worked for me so far.

Unknown said...

Awesome Post Chalene. Makes me think back to some of the motivational seminars I have gone to and how they can be applied towards anything, not just work.

BTW, Heather says she is not able to post to your blog.

Anonymous said...

One of my favorite quotes is "We don't see things as they are: we see them as we are." I love this because it applies to almost anything you can think of, whether it be a city, people, or exercise! I am an ambitious, energetic person (like yourself!) and so I see exercise as not just a way to stay in shape, but a fun energy booster! I think if you look at something in the way you are and it appeals to you through that view, you will enjoy it SO much more. I don't know. That's just seemed to work for me, so I thought I'd comment! Also, just started Turbo Jam this week and am IN LOVE WITH IT! You're such an inspirational instructor and not cheesy bubbly like most of the video trainers I've tried. I'm still a teen and am not trying to lose weight, but have a nicey toned body. Sarah Jessica Parker is my celebrity body idol :) Thanks for all you've done Miss Johnson and keep it up! You've helped SO many people and I hope you know you're VERY appreciated :)

Anonymous said...

Chalene,

Cardio Party Remix is your best one yet! Wish it were longer. Please have a 1 hour version similar to CPR. It's so much fun! Love doing more turbos! Can't wait to get the 6 new ones :)

Dawn

Anonymous said...

A great website full of motivation and no excuses is flylady.net. At first glance it looks like it is about cleaning your home but Marla Ciley(AKA THE FLYLADY) is about being the best you can be whatever your situation/limitations are!! My favorite line she uses is you can do anything for 5 minutes! When I read your blog about Larry Winget she came to my mind too. Check it out!!Thanks Chalene!

myles cranford said...

Greetings Chalene! re:Do me a favor. Please post any phrase, quote, or concept that directly caused you to make a change in your life. Even if the quote came from your 4th grade teacher. I'd love to hear it.------One of my favorite "wisdom sayings" is: THERE IS SO MUCH GOOD IN THE WORST OF US, AND SO MUCH BAD IN THE BEST OF US...THAT IT BEHOOVES ALL OF US, NOT TO TALK ABOUT THE REST OF US

Anonymous said...

"The only thing you should fear is regret."

I've forced myself to overcome a lot of fears with that one. Even if I'm unsuccessful at least I'll never have to regret not make an attempt.

Side note: I got my Turbo Jam dvds in the mail yesterday and did the Learn & Burn and The 20 Minute work out today. So much fun!! I love it.

Thanks for putting together such a great program!

Jessica
Smith's, Bermuda

Anonymous said...

Chalene, I so needed this. I have a lot of work frogs and other frogs and this really hit home for me. Especially about why I procrastinate and not do them. I'm getting that Brian Tracy book (and I got the Shut Up book you mentioned as well). Here's the saying I retained over the years: Discipline is the key that unlocks the treasure. When I was in an internship progam in high school (almost 20 yrs ago), the person who directed the program said this and I've never forgot it and in fact have a sign with the message posted in my apartment.

Take care,

Melody

Anonymous said...

eoSo I get daily e-mails from Oprah...well in reality I get automated mass e-mails which are titled "Today's Mission Calendar Inspiration" and this quote, which I received recently, really came at the right time, and definitely left its mark.


"There are no precedents: You are the first You that ever was." -- Christopher Morley

Anonymous said...

My favorite quote came from an article on friendship that I read from Chalene a long time ago. I'm paraphrasing, but it was something like..."When someone you thought was a friend disappoints you, don't brude about it or ban them forever, just put them in a different catagory of friend." I read that article at just the right time. It was the first time I ever heard someone say that you should never have more than 5 really important and supportive people in your life, or you won't have enough time to devote to them the love and infection they deserve. I thought that every friend I met was supposed to be that for me. After I read that, I don't take it so personal when someone does something crappy or of low charachter. Now I just think of it as a way to reserve more time for those who are truly my friends vs. those who I'm friendly with.

I also love in Cardio Party 1, when you say that on the days you don't feel like working out, thats when its the most important to do it. I thought it was just me :)

Anonymous said...

Hi, Chalene. I wanted to post to tell you thanks for creating Turbo Jam. You've given me something that 2 years worth of Cathe Freidrich and The Firm never did --FLAT ABS! After having children, I never thought it was possible. After only a few weeks of doing Turbo Jam, I've lost 4 inches in my waist. I never thought this was possible, but it happened! Thank you so much for the workouts. You've really changed my life. Thanks to you, it will be a bikini summer for me!

Oh, a favorite quote of mine:

"We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give."

-Sir Winston Churchill

Anonymous said...

The 1st time I read it, it spoke to my soul.

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be
in silence.

As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull
and ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit. If you
compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always
there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your
achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your career, however humble; it is a real possession in
the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue
there is; many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full
of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about
love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial
as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of
youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do
not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and
loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you
have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the
universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and
whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep
peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful
world.

Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.

-- Max Ehrmannn

Anonymous said...

lots of ispiring things i read in your blog this morning. am in the midst of life style change and is going through weight loss program. more power to you!

Anonymous said...

Hi Chalene! I am a new Turbo Jammer and you are an amazing woman! Your spunky personality and inspiring words of wisdom are enough to keep me going each day! However, I want to post a couple verses from a song that always motivates me. Being the music buff you are, I'm sure you'll recognize it. The song is "All or Nothing" by Athena Cage (from the "Save the Last Dance" movie):

Here's the chance of life,
Get ready, set, fly, high, above the fear of your mind!
Go for it, it's hit or miss,
Too late for you to quit,
You got to show 'em how bad you really want this!
OOOOhhhhhhh


Live your dreams, it's not as hard as it may seem.
You have to work to get the cream, On your hopes you must lean.
From your fears
You have to wean yourself
It's all or nothing.
Give your everything!

Anonymous said...

OHIO...Only Handle It Once. I use that all the time. I got it from a co-worker who seemed to be really on top of things. Her husband is in the corporate world and he applies it to business. I apply it to EVERYTHING. If I have a problem with someone, I handle it once and then if I have to hear about it again, I change the subject or simply walk away. I use it to keep clutter out of my life. I have a clean house, the clothes are put away and I actually have free time at the end of the day to spend with my DH! Thank you Chalene for being a huge inspiration in my life. I just wish you could see the changes you have made in my life!

Anonymous said...

Everybody needs to pull their own weight, and no one should expect you to carry theirs on top of yours...

Anonymous said...

Omg!! Chalene turbo jam is the best thing!! your the best.. im so happy all the time knowing I feel greater about my self.. the flat stomic iv always wanted thiner legs I dont complaine im fat anymore. If I could repay you I would some way some how. Its worth it I love youu =) if it wasent for you an turbo jam id still be saying im fat and being un happy.. im only 15. But like you said age dosent matter. Im writting from Canada, id just had to let you know you are the greatest and you'd help me=) Thanx soo muchh!! Natasha

Anonymous said...

This applies to all aspects of life although it may sound slightly academic....

- In this world we live and die by our own sword...educate yourself.